Ahh, perspective.
Ugh, finally -- fiance and I have come to a mutual understanding under all of these changes. I tried being firm about some changes I wanted to make concerning my attitude about things, and my having some characteristics similar to my mom (which are victim-like characteristics.)
He compared my wanting to make changes to my life to how his mom suddenly and drastically made changes to her life, and then left him and his dad when he was only seven years old. He was afraid of losing me, just like he lost his mom. I have had lots of conversations with him about his mom, and know his mom to some degree, but didn't realize what I was doing. At that point, I apologized for pushing so hard, and he apologized for being so defensive towards my need for some changes. So now I just need to be firm enough not to collapse under the pressure not to push him too hard! Haha.
Also, the money situation is almost resolved. Fiance is going to get on pay-scale soon, and that will give him about two dollars more an hour at his job. I have been working with my dad, and with both his work and mine combined, we are just about back on track from the management screwing us over. Which is one of the biggest reasons why I've been so damned stressed out!
It was good for me to stay with my parents for the better part of a week -- I got myself some perspective on how I've been living.
He compared my wanting to make changes to my life to how his mom suddenly and drastically made changes to her life, and then left him and his dad when he was only seven years old. He was afraid of losing me, just like he lost his mom. I have had lots of conversations with him about his mom, and know his mom to some degree, but didn't realize what I was doing. At that point, I apologized for pushing so hard, and he apologized for being so defensive towards my need for some changes. So now I just need to be firm enough not to collapse under the pressure not to push him too hard! Haha.
Also, the money situation is almost resolved. Fiance is going to get on pay-scale soon, and that will give him about two dollars more an hour at his job. I have been working with my dad, and with both his work and mine combined, we are just about back on track from the management screwing us over. Which is one of the biggest reasons why I've been so damned stressed out!
It was good for me to stay with my parents for the better part of a week -- I got myself some perspective on how I've been living.
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